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My experience of mental illness whilst at school

I suffered in silence everyday as I knew nothing about depression, what it meant or what it was like to be suffering with it. I didn't ever feel like I fitted in. I never ate because I never felt hungry. I would lie awake most nights writing a diary and then fall asleep during the day in lessons or skip days all together. I was badly bullied throughout secondary school yet the teachers failed to notice, and even if they were told nothing was ever done. I must have cried at least twice a day at school in secret so no one would know and walk out with a brave face. I harmed myself by cutting my arms, pulling my hair out and also overdosed, yet no one ever thought to ask if it was depression. I was just brushed off as attention seeking and a trouble child. A GP was once called out to prescribe diazepam to calm me down, yet no further help was offered. I would have liked my teachers to have realised I was having a bad time rather than telling me I looked tired and even handing me anorexia leaflets - then maybe I would have fitted in more and had less troubled school days.

The school could have looked more into my behaviour and spoken to my parents or even to a GP. They could have pulled me to one side and listened to my troubles, even offered some sort of support or counselling. I also feel more should have been done about the bullying and the way it made me feel.

The staff and teachers should have treated me the same as everyone else but on top added extra help and support, and not wait for me to ask because I never felt like I could let anyone know I was suffering. I guess I needed them to tell me I wasn't different but that I was suffering from a condition that could be treated. I think now more than ever it is important for schools to make everyone aware of mental illness and that there isn't anything to be ashamed of. There should be classes on how to know if you have depression, and what to do about it. There should be posters and leaflets all around, a proper support system, and maybe even groups for sufferers in school - people need to be aware depression isn't all about feeling sad and crying, it is an illness that eats you up and when left untreated can take over your life.

I feel any sort of lesson on mental illness would help just so young adults become aware of it, that they can get help if needed and where to get it from. I also think teachers need more training on how to spot the signs of a sufferer and what they need to do to help....there was nothing in my school looking back now, and reading my diary I went through hell and back and most of it could have been prevented had I been given support in the form of talking therapy and even medication. I hate the thought that any other teenager could be suffering just as much as I did. PLEASE MAKE SCHOOLS AWARE!!!

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